Michal refuses to weigh the practicality of augmenting his trifling Fiction Corpus with a fable about fiction writing; cites fatigue
Posted:
I believe in the feasibility of upholding English as an international language for the world. I do question the enervatingly inanimate blueprint with which English is taught.
Perfecting one's knowledge of a language isn't like pioneering a more comfortable bed. A language - a common language - is not just an instrument that you can teach yourself to employ with a greater amount of precision. A shared language can not be unlinked from the philosophical currents of a recognized nation of which it is a description. A language isn't recited; it happens - and keeps happening as long as a circle of people keeps using it.
Teaching a person to recite English is to deprive him of its cultural context. An informed teacher must prepare a plan for introducing it; the smartest student ventures out to seek it.
A dictionary has the potential to be an influential tool. A decent dictionary will define a language based on a specific corpus, a body of writing of various scope and consistency. They can contain anything from a book about literature to a collection of science fiction reviews. I watched many nights pass creating my "awe-inspiring" Fiction Corpus to form a new kind of dictionary based on the ability of one man to tell a story in myriad forms. It is a labor of love and listening.
I have drafted a million words and I have dissected them, reformulating them - not just to teach a language but to describe the human soul, and to encourage that spirit or soul not just to recite but to happen.
A word can represent many things. First and foremost it represents a type of gesture. A specific way of speaking. A specific way of inscribing a mark. A specific way of moving your hand. To know one of these kinds of gestures is to know how to pronounce the word well in some kind of way.
If you want to communicate an idea using the word well, you will need to know what other people are made to think when you make the gesture. You will never have complete awareness of or control over the associations or identities that are invoked by a set of words, but you can know what was and what is a single word's jointly accepted definition, at least for a given place, thereby tracing a direction which will help you to understand what kinds of associations and identities are driving its use.
By using the word yourself, you enter into a long-standing albeit oftentimes unconscious debate over its definition, forever entangling yourself into the history of its use. The way you use it, and which other words you use it with carries weight.
The more you know about where the word well is located in the fabric of a language, the better you will be at exploiting its cultural power.
Pronunciation of Well
I have yet to publish a pronunciation for the word well.
Video of me pronouncing "well."
Definition of Well
A well is an artifact consisting of a usually circular frame holding apart the earth so that water can bubble up to the surface and get scooped out. It's also a fuel that your mouth burns while it's waiting for more important words to form. It also refers to the fuel of one's existence, namely one's health, as long as that health is promoting rather than restricting one's movement. It sometimes refers to movement itself insofar as it is an act of bubbling up and aggregating at a surface and sometimes it just refers to something that's positive.
Common use of well in illustrative example sentences
I have yet to come up with a sixth sentence using the word well.
Audio of me saying the sentence:
I have yet to come up with a seventh sentence using the word well.
Audio of me saying the sentence:
Usage of Well in Michal's Fiction Corpus
Michal's Fiction Corpus of Acceptance Literature (FiCAL) is presented under the Bare Bottom imprint. It is currently comprised of six bodies of work, each representing a different pillar of culture and incorporating a wide variety of writhing styles.
I have yet to make a morphological analysis of the word well.
That doesn't mean it's not high on my list.
Table of Frequency for the Word "Well."
This table lists in descending order the total number of times that the word welland any of its morphological derivations appears in the Fiction Corpus, along with a breakdown of frequency by title, the respective rank of each word in the complete list of all words in the Corpus, as calculated both densely and competitively, as well as the percent increase in frequency of the word over the frequency of the next lowest rank in the complete list.
Percent Increase over next rank
RANK
WORD
Frequency
TOTAL # of occurences
MCDONALDS
JESUS
SEX
TSIGA
JACKSON
DINGBATS
dense
competitive
modern/sloppy
biblical/terse
poetic/high-brow
hard/fast
talky
mixed salad
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
I have yet to publish the table of frequency for the word well, but I will get to it shortly. -Michal
A story bible for a comic book series set in a post climate-change California narrated by eight characters who live through a natural disaster that sinks Los Angeles and triggers a war with an expansionist Mexican government covertly supported by China.
Frame #3197
chase says im dithering. he thinks i ought to board the wells fargo and see what happens. im sure id love to see a bullet go into my chest.
An experimental science fiction Christology that makes Jesus the hard boiled narrator of his own early years on a bizarro earth made dark by volcanic ash and informally ruled by a man from Mars who sells bottled air.
Jesus's legitimacy might've immediately improved if he had told everyone how the resistance was being run: by using smuggled weapons destined for a Martian: with money robbed from a bank the night before the Polish army 'accidentally' blew it up. That would've been like shooting oneself in the foot to prove one's bravery. Jesus had to swear each and every Confederate to secrecy. No one could disclose the neighborhood, much less the exact location, from which the Confederacy had been armed. No one could mention duffel bags. The only person Jesus worried about was their Lieutenant, the only non-terrorist prisoner he ever held. When Jesus decided to hand over the body of the Martian, as a sign of good faith, to an independent international investigative commission, he decided to release the Lieutenant as well. By then, his mention of a bank robbery only served to confuse. No one had proof that the bank had ever been robbed. There had been a breakdown in communications: a clerical error: the azimuth had been mistranscribed. The army had been duly criticized - no one liked mentioning the bank, especially after a certain commissioner leaked out anonymously the information that similarly mistranscribed azimuths had appeared simultaneously in seemingly isolated locations. That really helped Jesus's cause.
"Oh," said the teacher, "that's very nice, but which hospital?"
"I don't know," said your father.
"You don't know?" said his teacher.
"I can't pronounce it," said your father, smiling very nervously.
"Oh," said the teacher. "Well, that's alright: Poland." There was a moment of silence before she went to the next person, who said, of course, "Bethesda."
It was very embarrassing. I was mad at your father for having to be so honest.
The trick with cows, according to Jesus, was letting them lick salt off your bare shoulder. They loved salt, like candy. In fact, Jesus gave her candy too, but who knows how much she liked it. The salt: that was precious. They could lick salt till doomsday. Give a cow like Moochka salt, and you'll get twenty-four liters a day: three times eight. What a super yield: to the last month - since you can't milk on the last month. She was a good cow. If you said, "Moochka, we're going to sleep," she would lie down: you could sit on top of her. "Sit on top of a cow!" the people said. "Now that's a cow!" said your father, on top of the cow. But you had to treat her right. You had to warm her water in the winter - straight from the well was unacceptable.
With fire came smoke as well. It was good for curing meat, but apart from that, it pretty much stank. The real problem was that man had moved indoors. With fire, he no longer feared caves: that which was once cold and dark and potentially full of predators was now full of light and warmth and people - and smoke; that was irritating. Charcoal was good, but only helped so much. In colder climes, it was rather ineffective. The problem of smoke in the domicile was not solved for millennia. The problem of smoke in general was still frustrating man years after the explosions at Yellowstone.
A literature book narrated by a pair of siblings on either side of the Atlantic whose profoundly weird sexual experiences pose a serious challenge to their traditional understanding of mathematicians, marriage, gay young men and God.
London was never able to drink it all up, and, in the face of expanding civilization, it was forced to go underground, where its water is currently drained by sewer. Isn't that amazing? You would never think that under such a great metropolis there lay a massive underground river. Well, who knows how massive it is - I'm having trouble imagining. When they say "drained by sewer," who knows what's going on? It could be a little trickle here and there; it could be a massive discharge of fluid from gigantic pipes. What do you think?
Macy said bananas, Nike said peaches, Luke said both and I said neither. The peaches won. "Well I'm not surprised," said Nike, "after all, peaches come from a better family." I asked him what he meant and he lifted his arm and cocked his head poetically: "The Rose Family." Everyone laughed, and, the tension marvelously diffused, it was time to change places, get drinks, and move on to other topics.
Great sinew that grips the crest of the pelvic girdle - at the threshold of ilium - whence many great muscles start their journey, such as gluteus maximus, rectus femoris, his three vasti (lateralis, medialis and intermedius): four great ships whose massive hulls you, sartorius, have the privilege of escorting down man's thigh (cuddling them, wrapping yourself over and across them) until you fall spiraling down the inner side, inserting yourself at the tibia, that shimmering place behind which the robust and shapely gastrocnemius makes his dwelling: the great propellant, whom the ancients framed with gleaming buskins, which, connecting with the humble soleus, comes down to the very heel of man: that splendiferous tuberosity! that beneficial growth which takes the weight of our standing, which balances our otherwise feeble attempts at uprightness.
– Title 3, Regarding a Dream, Chapter 2, The Second Day, Part 1, Labor & Economic Reform, Section 22, Encountering Poverty, Paragraph 55
A collection of stories featuring a sexy Parisian ghost, a spooky Moon base full of vagina-faced aliens, a policeman with an Irish name, a truck full of watermelons, a flautist, and a man who has to see another man about a diseased horse.
The woman stopped whatever she was doing. Shephard imagined her staring at him. She said, "Why would you say that?"
Gog knew she spoke the truth. His consort was swayed, like many women, by complex emotions. Never before had he met one so well attuned to them. At the same time, Gog saw the error behind the eloquence.
Customs had to be learned. Every time Patsy went to investigate a famous statue of Buddha, he would spend the night at a local hot springs. Japanese etiquette demands that, before entering a public bath, one first wash himself thoroughly with soap and water. To this end, a well-drained area is prepared with spigots, buckets and ladles.
A real play. With drama in it. Talk fast. It takes two hours. Set in a guest house. In a small community. After a murder. Lots of suspicion. The characters learn to listen to each other. It's funny.
(FLETCHER and MS. JACKSON exit.)
LESBIAN: Now my passions are roused! In this room lies my chance to consummate my love for her. How wonderful a thing is a parlor! Only a lecher seeks his victims in their own beds. Normal folk must wait for respectable opportunities to have their lusts filled. My landlady knows as well as I that, once the rest of the house has gone to sleep, having respected my privacy, I shall have reason to wake her - or she me - whichever the case may be, depending on who can resist temptation longer. With looks such as hers, I doubt I can.
– ACT II, lines 307-307
LUKE: (to ALICE)
I'll explain later.
MS. JACKSON: How dare you invade this house? You idiot! What were you trying to do? Rape my cook? Don't tell me she was expecting you. You weren't expecting him, were you?
KOKOMO: No.
MS. JACKSON: You were trying to seduce her. My God! With a sudden invasion of the sofa bed? Not even an imbecile would consider that an effective strategy. You've lost your wits completely, haven't you? Pathetic. If you're so desperate for sex, why don't you try buying some attention?
GREY GOOSE: I admit that there have been a few times in the past couple years when I thought my vow of fidelity to you had long since expired. There may even have been a few times when I looked after a nice bit of flesh. Despite that, I've never been unfaithful to you, Ms. Jackson, no matter what you might think. As for this, I won't deny what I was after - and have been after for too long now - which is, namely, to sleep in my own bed, whether or not your cook or your lover or anyone else is in it at the time - and that, my dear, is a matter of your own construction.
MS. JACKSON: You deserved to be expelled. Do you think I enjoyed getting looks in town? Complimenting my dress, were they? You promised me you had never fooled around and that you never would. Now I know every single word they ever uttered about you is true. How could you? After all we've been through? I loved you.
FLETCHER: Come on.
GREY GOOSE: Wait. I've got some more to say. I confess I earned somewhat of a reputation in my day - for reasons mostly beyond my control, like my virility and my instinctual desire to perform well.
FLETCHER: Don't screw it up.
– ACT II, lines 347-355
ALICE: Repeatedly.
FLETCHER: Yes.
ALICE: Why is that?
FLETCHER: Why not?
ALICE: Don't you think that's excessive?
FLETCHER: We don't have to do it if you don't want to do it. It's only pretend.
ALICE: You might as well have written in a sex scene.
FLETCHER: That's not a bad idea.
ALICE: I'm not going to support your work if this is your way of having your work support you.
FLETCHER: Perfect. Keep that tone of voice. We're both confused by this strange courtship. 'Susannah' - that's your English name - 'why do you fear my boat?'
– ACT II, lines 50-59
(GREY GOOSE enters unseen carrying a letter.) GREY GOOSE: You, a farmer? Gardening maybe - but farming? Your hands are too sensitive. They were made for handling stems and bulbs.
KOKOMO: Can I help you?
GREY GOOSE: Excuse me. I was at the post office and I found a letter for your husband marked 'urgent.'
ALICE: For Luke?
GREY GOOSE: From his team's manager.
ALICE: It must be important. I had better go find him. Thank you. Excuse me, Kokomo. I'm afraid I must leave you - though I hate to do it. This doesn't bode very well for my honeymoon. Thanks for the massage!
– ACT I, lines 846-851
AT RISE: KOKOMO is wiping up the floor.
KOKOMO: Clean. Clean. Clean. We are obsessed by cleaning. If space is a giant vacuum, why does all the dust settle here: underneath the table? Why not in the middle of the floor? Where I can see it? Where I can wipe it up with my feet? We know perfectly well why, don't we, Kokomo? Master Fletcher can't be bothered to take off his shoes. Thanks to him, it's: 'wipe the floor, Kokomo.' Yes, Ms. Jackson. 'Clean the kitchen, girl.' Yes, Ms. Jackson. 'When is lunch, dear?' I don't know, Ms. Jackson. Honestly, where does all this dust come from? What am I supposed to do with it? There really is no sense in cleaning more than once a month. Let the moon show when it's time to clean. Ms. Jackson certainly doesn't know. She would have me clean my way right into an early grave. Kokomo was not built for dust. She was built for love.
A story book full of short fiction stories. An interesting bedtime mystery. A fairy tale. Science fiction romance. Adult life. Uninspiring gay fiction. Horror.
The therapy didn't just seem to cure headaches. It seemed to cure Steve O's anger as well. He realized it was high time he reconciled with his old friend. He sent him a letter. It included a heartfelt apology and an invitation to meet. Adam accepted. Steve O flew to L.A.
Management won. With the general decline in mail volume that year rural paychecks went down. Resentment and grumbling went up. When Rural Rural Route 6 finally acquired the house at the end of Profile it added to the workload and nothing else. Rural Route 4 felt overburdened as well. When Old Man Perkinson retired from Rural Rural Route 9 and it was decided once again to eliminate the vacant route, tempers flared.
Steve O auditioned for a show on his first day of class. He got the part of a dad. A pretty blonde got the part of the mom. Steve O was suddenly living the dream. He went head over heels. At a party, he got down on one knee just to propose a dance. Everything was going well. Until the girl's upperclass boyfriend intervened.
Proctor backed out of the bathroom. He looked at the window. There was a fire escape outside. It went up to the loft. Proctor went to look outside. He realized the window was unlocked. He locked it. He shut the curtain. He walked to the front door. He looked outside. The hallway was empty. Proctor tiptoed out. He tried to shut the door as quietly as he could. It wouldn't shut all the way. The frame was broken. Proctor left it. He started soft-shoeing his way down the hall. He could barely swallow his spit. There was a rock in his throat. The stairs seemed like they were getting farther and farther. He finally reached them. The stairwell was empty. He walked down the stairs. The lobby was empty. Proctor took a deep breath. He went outside. He waved to the policeman in the patrol car. He got to his own car. He drove off.
This table lists in descending order of frequency a selection of word pairs that appear in the Fiction Corpus and groups them according to the morphological derivation of the word well that appears in the pair.
Type
WORD
Frequency
TOTAL # of occurences
MCDONALDS
JESUS
SEX
TSIGA
JACKSON
DINGBATS
modern/sloppy
biblical/terse
poetic/high-brow
hard/fast
talky
mixed salad
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
I have yet to perform a collocation analysis of "well." I hope I can get it done sometime soon. -Michal
St. Sebastian was a member of the Roman Emperor's praetorian guard who had the audacity to teach Christian values while on the job. I think active duty American military men and women who don't vote or who don't publicly express a political opinion because of the uniform are either being idiotic or are being cowed by the threat of punishment from a superior. Either way, they're eunuchs. My purpose in creating the St. Sebastian Series is to put the flesh and face of the true soldier front and center. The good soldier puts his mission ahead of himself. He often ends up dead. The true soldier knows a bad mission when he sees one and he isn't afraid to say it. Saint Sebastian was not a cow, despite what clever people would have you believe. Saint Sebastian is a patron saint for all protestors who face the arrows of the mob for speaking out.
Help support the "Well" page up and running...
If you love women and art...
Michal is importing art...is he daffy?
Michal's Sales Pitch Lot 1: Silesian Handicrafts
T-shirt fundraiser for sale
Last T-Shirt with the logo that I designed.
From a set of, I believe, twenty produced by Margo and given out to a portion of the last 20 women to finish the 20th anniversary Fiat Road Race in Bielsko-Biała, cf. the movie. This is the last one left in it's original packaging and my supporters - like the poor women of Bielsko - are going to have to fight for it. Whoever invests the most money with me, and who lets me borrow it to invest in the next lot, will not only be rewarded with some beautiful piece of art, but will get this priceless t-shirt as a reward for being my top supporter. $1000.00 or best offer. Remember to authorize me to hold the sum as credit against a future purchase and to authorize me to borrow against it.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #1 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Felt handbag for sale
Felt bag by Dorota.
Entirely hand-sewn. Base: polyester felt, 100% PE. Motif: South American woolen yarn, dyed, 100% wool. Hand-worked with a needle. Unique and inimitable design. Inside: cotton fabric, closes with zipper, inside pocket. Available now for $220.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #2 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Decorative collar for sale
Decorative collar by Zuzanna.
Ethnic layered cloth jewelry constructed on a cotton base and adorned with ribbons, tassels, and a yellow fringe. Fastened on the side with 11 buttons, fitted entirely with a pleasant lining. The style is an Indo-Asian-African multinational color combination. The collar is very extravagant and an extraordinary addition to any clothing, guaranteed to attract attention. Just a simple dress and a unique image is ready. Dry-cleaning recommended. Available now for $200.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #3 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Seamless handbag for sale
Handbag by Sylwia.
Handmade from felted all-natural Australian and South American wool. Entirely felted, seamless. Finished with a white lining, inside is a small pocket. Lining is sewn and stitched in by hand. Available now for $180.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #4 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Patchwork quilt for sale
Patchwork quilt by Alicja.
Bedspread made of cotton and polyester material. Inserted with polyester lining. 90 by 70 cm. Available now for $120.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #5 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Nuno-felt shawl for sale
Shawl by Sylwia.
Scarf made with the nuno felting technique (wet felting fibre into a silk gauze) using South American wool. Two-sided scarf with latticework at the ends. Wholly in the colors red, black, green in an abstract pattern. Available now for $100.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #6 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Clara the doll for sale
Clara by Alicja.
Clara loves roses and greenery, adores tormenting spiders with long legs and sleeping soundly in the afternoon. Cuddly toy made of cotton and polyester, stuffed with polyester lining. Available now for $70.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #7 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Noah the doll for sale
Noah by Alicja.
Noah doesn't know what to like and what not to like but keeps wondering and thinking about it. Cuddly toy made of cotton and polyester, stuffed with polyester lining. Available now for $70.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #8 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Black suspenders for sale
Black suspenders by Zuzanna.
Two-sided suspenders from black material with a rose motif on one side and striped cotton on the other. Connected by a leather triangle. Adjustable length. Hand washing in cold water recommended. Available now for $50.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #9 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Orange suspenders for sale
Orange suspenders by Zuzanna.
Two-sided suspenders made of denim and orange material with a Polish floral folk design. Connected by a leather triangle. Adjustable length. Hand washing in cold water recommended. Available now for $50.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #10 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Green suspenders for sale
Green suspenders by Zuzanna.
Two-sided suspenders made of denim and green material with a mountain folk design. Connected by a leather triangle. Adjustable length. Hand washing in cold water recommended. Available now for $50.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #11 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Felt earrings for sale
Felt earrings by Dorota.
Material: South American woolen yarn, dyed, 100% wool. Hand-worked with a needle. Pendant of anti-allergenic metal. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #12 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Round ceramic earrings for sale
Round ceramic earrings by Dorota.
Material: Glazed ceramics, hand-molded. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #13 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Oblong ceramic earrings for sale
Oblong ceramic earrings by Dorota.
Material: Glazed ceramics, hand-molded. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #14 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
'Coral' necklace for sale
Corals by Sylwia.
Necklace made of cotton pieces with organdy and decorated with beads, suspended on cotton strings. Can be worn as a necklace, as a brooch or as a belt tied at the side. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #15 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.