Michal declines to consider the soundness of enhancing his ordinary Fiction Corpus with a true story about founding an online art gallery; cites fatigue
Posted:
I believe in the possibility of promulgating English as everybody's second language. I don't trust in the prosaic plan by which English is presented for study.
Reenforcing a person's intimacy with a language isn't like pioneering a stronger crane. A language - a living tongue - is not just a tool that you can learn to utilize with greater amounts of precision. A language can't be unyoked from the prevailing culture of a circle of people of which it is a description. A language isn't recited; it happens - and keeps happening as long as a circle of people keeps using it.
Teaching a pupil to recite English is to cheat him out of its cultural context. An informed educator must have a blueprint for introducing it; the smartest pupil ventures out to seek it.
A dictionary can be an influential tool. A decent dictionary will define a language on the basis of a specific corpus, a body of written language of various size and consistency. They could include everything from a book about literature to some real gay fiction. I lost many a sleepless night developing my "mammoth" Fiction Corpus to form a new sort of dictionary based on the ability of one man to tell a story in myriad forms. It is a labor of love and listening.
I have molded a million words and I have anatomized them, reformulating them - not merely to teach an American language but to be an advocate for the human soul, and to pressure that spirit or soul not just to recite but to happen.
Michal's Dictionary: Understanding the word Shoulder
A word can represent many things. First and foremost it represents a type of gesture. A specific way of speaking. A specific way of inscribing a mark. A specific way of moving your hand. To know one of these kinds of gestures is to know how to pronounce the word shoulder in some kind of way.
If you want to communicate an idea using the word shoulder, you will need to know what other people are made to think when you make the gesture. You will never have complete awareness of or control over the associations or identities that are invoked by a set of words, but you can know what was and what is a single word's jointly accepted definition, at least for a given place, thereby tracing a direction which will help you to understand what kinds of associations and identities are driving its use.
By using the word yourself, you enter into a long-standing albeit oftentimes unconscious debate over its definition, forever entangling yourself into the history of its use. The way you use it, and which other words you use it with carries weight.
The more you know about where the word shoulder is located in the fabric of a language, the better you will be at exploiting its cultural power.
Pronunciation of Shoulder
I have yet to publish a pronunciation for the word shoulder.
Video of me pronouncing "shoulder."
Definition of Shoulder
I have yet to publish the definition of shoulder.
I'm sure it won't take too long.
Common use of shoulder in illustrative example sentences
I have yet to come up with a fourth sentence using the word shoulder.
Audio of me saying the sentence:
I have yet to come up with a fifth sentence using the word shoulder.
Audio of me saying the sentence:
I have yet to come up with a sixth sentence using the word shoulder.
Audio of me saying the sentence:
I have yet to come up with a seventh sentence using the word shoulder.
Audio of me saying the sentence:
Usage of Shoulder in Michal's Fiction Corpus
Michal's Fiction Corpus of Acceptance Literature (FiCAL) is presented under the Bare Bottom imprint. It is currently comprised of six bodies of work, each representing a different pillar of culture and incorporating a wide variety of writhing styles.
I have yet to make a morphological analysis of the word shoulder.
That doesn't mean it's not high on my list.
Table of Frequency for the Word "Shoulder."
This table lists in descending order the total number of times that the word shoulderand any of its morphological derivations appears in the Fiction Corpus, along with a breakdown of frequency by title, the respective rank of each word in the complete list of all words in the Corpus, as calculated both densely and competitively, as well as the percent increase in frequency of the word over the frequency of the next lowest rank in the complete list.
Percent Increase over next rank
RANK
WORD
Frequency
TOTAL # of occurences
MCDONALDS
JESUS
SEX
TSIGA
JACKSON
DINGBATS
dense
competitive
modern/sloppy
biblical/terse
poetic/high-brow
hard/fast
talky
mixed salad
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
I have yet to publish the table of frequency for the word shoulder, but I will get to it shortly. -Michal
A story bible for a comic book series set in a post climate-change California narrated by eight characters who live through a natural disaster that sinks Los Angeles and triggers a war with an expansionist Mexican government covertly supported by China.
Frame #98
expedia - its understandable. bieber cant appreciate a womans funny side. hes too used to getting the cold shoulder.
An experimental science fiction Christology that makes Jesus the hard boiled narrator of his own early years on a bizarro earth made dark by volcanic ash and informally ruled by a man from Mars who sells bottled air.
"We need arms," said Jesus. "And I know where to get them. We need bridges; we need to secure every checkpoint around the Old Town - but first, we go north: to Sand Island. That will be our headquarters. We go north, penetrate the southern part of Center City, get to the armory, then bring those weapons back down to the Island. We secure the whole perimeter by converting every checkpoint to our cause - by force if we have too. Then, at dawn, you'll have your proof. We've got lots of work to do - lots of terrorists to kill. Kula, Nitka, Laska, Flak: you're in charge of weapons. Kula: you've got ammunition. Nitka: you're in charge of armor. Laska: shoulder weapons. Flak: the big guns. Stalin: you're with me. Stolarksi: you've got to secure every bridge coming out of Sand Island. Got it?"
"Fuck off, guys!" We ran - the way we used to run when Moochka was mad: with our knees up high and our shoulders back, so nobody could shoot us in the ass (which was known to happen, especially in certain parts of Treblinka).
A man is not a rabbit, as my grandfather used to say (whenever he received farmer's cheese on his plate); it's hard to imagine, whatever level of intelligence the first hunter possessed, that, after having dodged left and right in a vain attempt at chase, he didn't decide just to sit there and wait for his prey to come wandering within range. Perhaps having climbed into a nearby kola tree, the first hunter waited patiently while chewing its dry fruit, satisfying his hunger pangs until some succulent piece of game, unaware of its new predator hiding in the branches, came wandering underneath and WOOSH! went the rock, or WHIZ! went the wooden spear, aided by gravity to come violently crashing (or piercing, as the case may have been) right between the shoulders.
"Years and years ago," said Hitler, "I was just a young boy, but my dear father let me run around Centropolis willy-nilly - this was long before the Revolution, mind you: there was no question of being harmed - I was standing in the courtyard before the steps to the great Pyramid when, all of a sudden, this huge, old miner came up to me out of nowhere and put his huge, dirty hand on my shoulder, looking down at me with his huge, dirty face - those eyes: those blue eyes of his were standing out like gems - he said, 'Boy,' with his booming voice, 'Do you make yourself conscious of how that crack found itself on that there pyramid? Do you know who made that crack?' I shook my head. 'That was Sherman 'Lucky' Panzer the Second. You know how he made that crack?' I shook my head. 'Well, God Almighty! Let me tell you the story. Sherman 'Lucky' Panzer (not the Second, but the First) was the greatest, meanest, awfulest man ever to walk the Martian surface. You know what he was?' I shook my head. 'He was governor!' said the miner. 'He had five hundred privates - you know what a private does?' I nodded. 'You do?' said the miner.
A literature book narrated by a pair of siblings on either side of the Atlantic whose profoundly weird sexual experiences pose a serious challenge to their traditional understanding of mathematicians, marriage, gay young men and God.
I caught Luke at the corner of the street, he wearing his red anorak and bowler hat; so silly: the rain was collecting in the rim, dumping on his shoulders at every twist of the head; he looked like a leaking fire hydrant. But he hardly recognized me staring out of the cab. After I finally ventured out into the rain, I yelled at him: "You have a hood on that thing, why don't you use it?" But he said it wasn't big enough for the hat. I didn't ask for an explanation. And since Luke quickly took notice of my hair, I wasted no time asking him if I could shower at his place. When you're alone with Luke, it's best to be brief. As it turned out, he was on his way to a meeting. He wasn't planning on going back to his dormitory until right before Nike's party. I mentioned how fortuitous our meeting was, and he, being very conscious of fate, was obliged to change his plans. Giving up his key, Luke said that he would meet me in his room, and that he would be, at the very most, an hour.
I'm getting ahead of myself: I was sitting there in that bathroom, letting it steam, while I sat there obsessing about a bottle of alcohol. It was so trivial. There was no real necessity of bringing a bottle - I hadn't promised anything. I should not have looked silly going there empty-handed - after all, it's Nike we're talking about. I could've left before the party and come back shortly afterwards with a bottle. Nike probably would've come with me. Or else he would've let me go; I would've insisted. He would've said it were silly to do so, but I would've looked over my shoulder and smilingly said, "It's for my own good!"
Then he turned his head around, looking down the platform: he was looking at all the people. Then he turned his head back to me, looking at me briefly, but then he looked past me, over my shoulder behind me, looking at all the people. I was hoping to catch some tiny sign of sadness, some sort of squeezing of the face perhaps, or just a squeezing of the eye - anything: a half-smile pretending not to be a grimace. But only I was grimacing. Only my face was squeezing itself. And when Nike smiled, I could only nod back to him. He gave me one last wave and went to sit down, disappearing from view.
– Title 3, Regarding a Dream, Chapter 1, The First Day, Part 1, Victory & Calendar Reform, Section 1, Cancer, Paragraph 3, Clauses 11-18
Because even if the insects don't bite in heaven, and the lion salutes us, I still don't want to be rubbing shoulders against him all the time - you know what I mean?
Sitting down in a quiet corner, my stomach was well pleased. The prospect of food began to take its effect, and, our continual hunger notwithstanding, we reassured ourselves that we were not in a rush to eat, and that we could take the time to enjoy ourselves politely, now that we were alone together, and, of course, dependent on each other for conversation. I quickly chose a neutral subject: "Did you enjoy the lecture about Hogarth?" I asked. Macy said yes, but he decided not to elaborate. I said: "Funny thing about the bathroom, isn't it?" Macy said yes, but then he looked over his shoulder, examining the premises.
A collection of stories featuring a sexy Parisian ghost, a spooky Moon base full of vagina-faced aliens, a policeman with an Irish name, a truck full of watermelons, a flautist, and a man who has to see another man about a diseased horse.
Gog boarded with sword in hand. The eunuchs guarded their necks with their shoulders. They raised their hands in supplication. With one fell swoop, Gog chopped off their fingertips. He lifted the boy by his tunic. He asked him why he should spare his life.
Patsy knew something big was coming his way. He could feel it every time he saw the same man with the hunched shoulders visit the Dead Horse Marina. Something about it smelled fishy.
The concourse was crowded. Manga People were everywhere. It took a while to get to the vehicular elevator. Tatum was glad she didn't have to rub shoulders with so many aliens.
Tatum watched it barrel towards the station. The man was closing in on the door. His back was turned. Tatum squinted. The rock was heading towards him. It gleamed in the headlamps. It was on target. It hit the man's shoulder. "Yes," cried Tatum. The man grabbed his arm. He twisted around. He bounced to the ground.
The boy had known to keep quiet. When he watched the masked robber walk away with his flaut, Lorenzo noticed something peculiar about him. It had been a bittersweet revelation. There was indeed something to be admired in such audacity.
A brigand conceals his face. Rarely does he think to disguise his gait. Lorenzo, like his father and his mother, led with his shoulders. Ferrari, more than anybody else, led with his loins.
A real play. With drama in it. Talk fast. It takes two hours. Set in a guest house. In a small community. After a murder. Lots of suspicion. The characters learn to listen to each other. It's funny.
"Shoulder" does not make an appearance in Sorry Miss Jackson.
A story book full of short fiction stories. An interesting bedtime mystery. A fairy tale. Science fiction romance. Adult life. Uninspiring gay fiction. Horror.
She squeezed me. She pressed her face into my shoulder. She made a grunting sound. She whispered, "I have to go home." I watched her withdraw her legs from around me. I watched her fix her skirt. She wiped her eyes. I went to find a handkerchief. I wondered what happened. I told myself to stop. It wasn't important.
I found a square of silk. I moistened it. I gave it to Indiana. She wiped her face. She apologized.
Indiana lay her head on the crook of my neck. I slid my fingers beneath her underwear. I lifted her onto my hands. I held her by the skin of her bottom. I rocked her. I kept pace with her lilting chest. Our shoulders rose and fell. We were like a mother and child.
She told me Albert was sick. He was going to die. I cooed. I kissed her on the cheek. I told her I would put her to bed.
"You will go to the Nautilus," said Orbitz. He started removing Sara Lee's skin suit. She did the same for him. "When you get there I'll already be onboard." Sara Lee stopped. Orbitz stared mournfully into her eyes. He said, "When you get there I won't remember this. I'll look much younger than I do now."
Sara Lee turned. Orbitz's hands hovered desperately above her naked shoulders. "I knew it," she said. "You're from the future." Orbitz grasped her. He embraced her as hard as he could.
We started to breathe deeply. I rubbed her shoulder. Her sobbing eased into an intermittent sniffle. I enjoyed the smell of her perfume. I wondered if I recognized it. I wished I could ask her what it was.
This table lists in descending order of frequency a selection of word pairs that appear in the Fiction Corpus and groups them according to the morphological derivation of the word shoulder that appears in the pair.
Type
WORD
Frequency
TOTAL # of occurences
MCDONALDS
JESUS
SEX
TSIGA
JACKSON
DINGBATS
modern/sloppy
biblical/terse
poetic/high-brow
hard/fast
talky
mixed salad
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
I have yet to perform a collocation analysis of "shoulder." I hope I can get it done sometime soon. -Michal
If a 45-year-old businesswoman and hard working mother of three kids is going to pose nude for a calendar, it's gonna have to be a good one. Margo didn't start a coffee shop called the Vagina Cafe to win her favors from the establishment. Even as she dishes out prizes to the 20 women who placed last in the twentienth anniversary run of her town's biggest road race, her business, unlike everyone else, doesn't get mentioned. She was an official sponsor for Christ's sake! But the announcer just couldn't swallow his patriarchy and get the words "Vagina Cafe" out of his mouth. That's not something a proper gentleman would say in front of a crowd of humble God-fearing "ladies" who cherish their modesty! And a Body Acceptance Calendar is certainly not what a humble God-fearing book-seller like a Barnes and Noble would put on their shelves! So how do I expect to sell this in the mainstream? Maybe if you download the free versions a thousand billion times it might help. Start downloading.
Your support keeps the "Shoulder" page up and running...
If you love women and art...
Michal is exporting art...is he cracked?
Michal's Sales Pitch Lot 1: Silesian Handicrafts
T-shirt fundraiser for sale
Last T-Shirt with the logo that I designed.
From a set of, I believe, twenty produced by Margo and given out to a portion of the last 20 women to finish the 20th anniversary Fiat Road Race in Bielsko-Biała, cf. the movie. This is the last one left in it's original packaging and my supporters - like the poor women of Bielsko - are going to have to fight for it. Whoever invests the most money with me, and who lets me borrow it to invest in the next lot, will not only be rewarded with some beautiful piece of art, but will get this priceless t-shirt as a reward for being my top supporter. $1000.00 or best offer. Remember to authorize me to hold the sum as credit against a future purchase and to authorize me to borrow against it.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #1 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Felt handbag for sale
Felt bag by Dorota.
Entirely hand-sewn. Base: polyester felt, 100% PE. Motif: South American woolen yarn, dyed, 100% wool. Hand-worked with a needle. Unique and inimitable design. Inside: cotton fabric, closes with zipper, inside pocket. Available now for $220.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #2 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Decorative collar for sale
Decorative collar by Zuzanna.
Ethnic layered cloth jewelry constructed on a cotton base and adorned with ribbons, tassels, and a yellow fringe. Fastened on the side with 11 buttons, fitted entirely with a pleasant lining. The style is an Indo-Asian-African multinational color combination. The collar is very extravagant and an extraordinary addition to any clothing, guaranteed to attract attention. Just a simple dress and a unique image is ready. Dry-cleaning recommended. Available now for $200.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #3 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Seamless handbag for sale
Handbag by Sylwia.
Handmade from felted all-natural Australian and South American wool. Entirely felted, seamless. Finished with a white lining, inside is a small pocket. Lining is sewn and stitched in by hand. Available now for $180.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #4 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Patchwork quilt for sale
Patchwork quilt by Alicja.
Bedspread made of cotton and polyester material. Inserted with polyester lining. 90 by 70 cm. Available now for $120.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #5 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Nuno-felt shawl for sale
Shawl by Sylwia.
Scarf made with the nuno felting technique (wet felting fibre into a silk gauze) using South American wool. Two-sided scarf with latticework at the ends. Wholly in the colors red, black, green in an abstract pattern. Available now for $100.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #6 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Clara the doll for sale
Clara by Alicja.
Clara loves roses and greenery, adores tormenting spiders with long legs and sleeping soundly in the afternoon. Cuddly toy made of cotton and polyester, stuffed with polyester lining. Available now for $70.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #7 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Noah the doll for sale
Noah by Alicja.
Noah doesn't know what to like and what not to like but keeps wondering and thinking about it. Cuddly toy made of cotton and polyester, stuffed with polyester lining. Available now for $70.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #8 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Black suspenders for sale
Black suspenders by Zuzanna.
Two-sided suspenders from black material with a rose motif on one side and striped cotton on the other. Connected by a leather triangle. Adjustable length. Hand washing in cold water recommended. Available now for $50.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #9 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Orange suspenders for sale
Orange suspenders by Zuzanna.
Two-sided suspenders made of denim and orange material with a Polish floral folk design. Connected by a leather triangle. Adjustable length. Hand washing in cold water recommended. Available now for $50.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #10 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Green suspenders for sale
Green suspenders by Zuzanna.
Two-sided suspenders made of denim and green material with a mountain folk design. Connected by a leather triangle. Adjustable length. Hand washing in cold water recommended. Available now for $50.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #11 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Felt earrings for sale
Felt earrings by Dorota.
Material: South American woolen yarn, dyed, 100% wool. Hand-worked with a needle. Pendant of anti-allergenic metal. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #12 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Round ceramic earrings for sale
Round ceramic earrings by Dorota.
Material: Glazed ceramics, hand-molded. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #13 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
Oblong ceramic earrings for sale
Oblong ceramic earrings by Dorota.
Material: Glazed ceramics, hand-molded. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #14 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
'Coral' necklace for sale
Corals by Sylwia.
Necklace made of cotton pieces with organdy and decorated with beads, suspended on cotton strings. Can be worn as a necklace, as a brooch or as a belt tied at the side. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.
To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #15 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.
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