Michal's HeadlinesSteam

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Bielsko-Biala, Poland

Photographs by Michal Slaby
A map showing Bielsko-Biala's position within Silesia
Bielsko-Biała lies in the corner of Silesia
Margo behind a tree

Steam, a cultural introduction

Getting to know the word from all angles...

Michal rejects the soundness of enlarging his voluminous Fiction Corpus with some good fiction; cites fatigueDictionary icon

I regard highly the feasibility of exercising English as a common language for the world. I do question the formalistic blueprint with which the English language is taught.Pointer

Boosting one's adeptness with a language isn't like pioneering a stronger wheelbarrow. A language is not just an instrument that you can learn to employ with a greater amount of precision. A language can't be fractured from the philosophical currents of a community of which it is a description. A language isn't recited; it happens - and keeps happening as long as a circle of people keeps using it.

Teaching a person to recite English is to rob her of its cultural context. A capable teacher must find a method of introducing it; the discerning pupil ventures out to seek it.

A dictionary - properly used - can become an influential tool. A decent dictionary will define a language on the basis of a specific corpus, a body of written works of varying scope and consistency. They might include everything from a book about literature to a lot of fiction books. I burned many candles laboring on my "handsome" Fiction Corpus in order to form a new kind of dictionary based on the ability of one man to tell a story in myriad forms. It is a labor of love and listening.

I have devised a million words and I have investigated them, reformulating them - not just to teach an American tongue but to promote the human soul, and to pressure that spirit or soul not just to recite but to happen.

Michal's Dictionary Navigation

A Learner's Dictionary: Common Words in EnglishPointer

An Artifact is the Common Word that Answers the Question, "What?"

The most frequently used words in Michal's Corpus that represent common artifacts

Michal's Dictionary:
Understanding the word Steam

A word can represent many things. First and foremost it represents a type of gesture. A specific way of speaking. A specific way of inscribing a mark. A specific way of moving your hand. To know one of these kinds of gestures is to know how to pronounce the word steam in some kind of way.

If you want to communicate an idea using the word steam, you will need to know what other people are made to think when you make the gesture. You will never have complete awareness of or control over the associations or identities that are invoked by a set of words, but you can know what was and what is a single word's jointly accepted definition, at least for a given place, thereby tracing a direction which will help you to understand what kinds of associations and identities are driving its use.

By using the word yourself, you enter into a long-standing albeit oftentimes unconscious debate over its definition, forever entangling yourself into the history of its use. The way you use it, and which other words you use it with carries weight.

The more you know about where the word steam is located in the fabric of a language, the better you will be at exploiting its cultural power.

Pronunciation of SteamMargo on a trampoline

I have yet to publish a pronunciation for the word steam.

Video of me pronouncing "steam."

Definition of SteamMargo on a trampoline

I have yet to publish the definition of steam.

I'm sure it won't take too long.

Common use of steam in illustrative example sentencesMargo on a trampoline

  1. The switch on the kettle is broken so when you see the steam coming out just unplug it.

    Audio of me saying the sentence:
  2. You want to steam vegetables today?

    Audio of me saying the sentence:
  3. The industrial revolution was powered by steam.

    Audio of me saying the sentence:
  4. I wonder if I could build my own steam engine.

    Audio of me saying the sentence:
  5. I have yet to come up with a fifth sentence using the word steam.

    Audio of me saying the sentence:
  6. I have yet to come up with a sixth sentence using the word steam.

    Audio of me saying the sentence:
  7. I have yet to come up with a seventh sentence using the word steam.

    Audio of me saying the sentence:

Usage of Steam in Michal's Fiction CorpusMargo on a trampoline

An image of young Michal sitting on a potty in front of a typewriter

Michal's Fiction Corpus of Acceptance Literature (FiCAL) is presented under the Bare Bottom imprint. It is currently comprised of six bodies of work, each representing a different pillar of culture and incorporating a wide variety of writhing styles.

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Steam, a morphological approach

I have yet to make a morphological analysis of the word steam.

That doesn't mean it's not high on my list.

Table of Frequency for the Word "Steam."

This table lists in descending order the total number of times that the word steamand any of its morphological derivations appears in the Fiction Corpus, along with a breakdown of frequency by title, the respective rank of each word in the complete list of all words in the Corpus, as calculated both densely and competitively, as well as the percent increase in frequency of the word over the frequency of the next lowest rank in the complete list.

Margo stretching her arms
Percent Increase over next rankRANKWORDFrequency
TOTAL # of occurencesMCDONALDSJESUSSEXTSIGAJACKSONDINGBATS
densecompetitivemodern/sloppybiblical/tersepoetic/high-browhard/fasttalkymixed salad
-----------
I have yet to publish the table of frequency for the word steam, but I will get to it shortly. -Michal

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Usage of Steam in Death to McDonalds

An aerial view of Dodger Stadium in the foreground, with an imaginary partially submerged Los Angeles behind

A story bible for a comic book series set in a post climate-change California narrated by eight characters who live through a natural disaster that sinks Los Angeles and triggers a war with an expansionist Mexican government covertly supported by China.

Frame #1953

im in the banya. drinking beer poolside. kohls's getting a massage in the steam room. i better be careful. its not very crowded.

Sprint "Iphone" Case

17 August, 12:57 PM

Frame #4906

i steamed all through the night. im gonna run out of fuel by the afternoon. but ive made up a lot of ground.

Sprint "Iphone" Case

3 November, 6:34 AM

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Usage of Steam in The Gospel of Jesus H.

A picture of the planet Mars

An experimental science fiction Christology that makes Jesus the hard boiled narrator of his own early years on a bizarro earth made dark by volcanic ash and informally ruled by a man from Mars who sells bottled air.

Those were not laughing days, child. In those days, there was much hardship. Sixty-eight years before I was born, Yellowstone exploded. Five thousand cubic kilometers of boiling magma came to blanket the Earth, kill mankind, terrorize his animals, and fell his favorite trees. Earth bled, and the sky grew dark. It rained blackness. The whole planet stank like a struck match: burning brimstone, like the Bible says - in other words, black clouds of sulfur: they came to suffocate, incinerate. In faraway places, water turned to steam: it boiled. Volcanic ash came tumbling down. The wind blew steam and hot rock. Millions died; the rest wept black tears.

Verse 72 from the chapter called Childhood

That night, Jesus and Zoe almost made love. Getting into bed, Jesus kissed her on the mouth. Zoe went wild. Rolling around, they kissed, pushed, pulled, hugged and squeezed. Zoe removed Jesus's clothes. She saw the tattooed Christogram upon his chest. She was sitting astride Jesus's waist. Pulling up her shirt, Jesus brought her back to attention. She removed it: she removed her shirt! and her bra and pulled Jesus up against her chest. Squeezing tightly, Jesus smelled the beautiful strength upon her breasts and kissed them. He pushed her down to the side of the bed and she spread her legs. Jesus mounted her and he was ready to do it, but there was too much: too much whirling around in his head: too much at stake: his destiny, his word, Zeus on Mars, and this half-Martian, half-Japanese creature in his bed, waiting to be fucked! Something was wrong. Jesus wanted her. He wanted to love this woman but not now: not here: not like this. This would have to wait. Jesus was quickly losing steam. The thought that Zoe must have prepared for this - must be taking contraceptives (there was no way she was looking to conceive) - was the occasion that finally prompted Jesus to cease rubbing himself up and down your mother's wet and fully engorged vulva.

Verse 781 from the chapter called Security

Protected by the MTA (the Martian Terrestrial Authority, which was created for the purpose), the nuclear bomb was successfully transported. In the meantime, in cooperation with Panzer-Tank Mining, Yariba Corporation dug a deep tunnel into the base of Olympus Mons, the largest volcano in the solar system. It's twenty-seven kilometers high! Five hundred and forty kilometers wide! I'm sure you've noticed it. They put the nuclear bomb inside the tunnel and off it went, clearing the most enormous cavern ever made. They drilled holes through the top. They drilled holes through the sides. They laid pipes. They brought water and boiled it. The steam went through the steam turbines, rose to the very top and fell back down again, going through the water turbines on the way back down to the boiler - a gigantic operation. A simple operation! A Martian child could appreciate its magnificent beauty, and, not having to wonder whence that blessed power comes, can look outside his northern window and see that brilliant topographical majesty that gives him light. Blessed Olympus! How young those Martians are when they first learn to fear her power! Give them light, Olympus! Not tyranny! Not shadow and pain! Give them light!

Verse 8 from the chapter called Childhood

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Usage of Steam in Sex for Children

A drawing of a man between a woman's legs in front of another man in a hospital bed

A literature book narrated by a pair of siblings on either side of the Atlantic whose profoundly weird sexual experiences pose a serious challenge to their traditional understanding of mathematicians, marriage, gay young men and God.

It made me wonder what kind of people were giving Luke his reputation these days. They can't be that much different from the ones we knew: no self-respecting woman would ever shag in that apartment - but I guess that goes for men too. In fact, what self-respecting person would ever choose to have anything to do with Luke in the first place? He can't possibly be raping them - the walls are too thin - unless he uses drugs - ah, but let us not speak of that.

– Title 1, Regarding Peaches and Bananas, Part 2, Section 2, Letting It Steam, Paragraph 1, Clauses 6-9

By the time I returned to that love seat, Nike was discussing something entirely different. I sat down, not paying attention, staring directly in front of me until I could no longer resist the temptation. Macy was being silent, and my head turned itself back to his. And there they were: set in a face of sharpness, transfixing their prey, poking through the heavy brows of a lowered face, a sorcerer's face; as he prepared his incantations, there they stood, ready at arms, two cauldrons of steaming black tar, two very cold celestial discs, two empty orbs that wanted possession of two separate worlds, two very wide walnut eyes waiting to crack, two pleading for mercy, two coaxing, too ready to resist.

– Title 1, Regarding Peaches and Bananas, Part 2, Section 9, Attacking homosexuality, Paragraph 2, Clauses 1-4

The vacuum, which actually worked - thank God - was beating the hell out of the shaggy rug, shooting clouds of dust into the room - literally - there was simply too much to suck at any one given place or time.

– Title 1, Regarding Peaches and Bananas, Part 2, Section 2, Letting It Steam, Paragraph 1, Clauses 4-5

I feared Macy, but I had not gone to Luke's room simply to avoid him. Sheltered in that warmth of steam, its gray dampness - cool drops of water gathering on the tip of my nose - warm gusts caressing my body, making me shiver with excitement - I did not admit to myself that I had come there to pleasure myself, to pamper myself, to prepare meticulously, to stare with giddy anticipation, and then, to unleash recklessly my physical beauty; all for the sake of Macy, so that I might join the party and stun him.

– Title 1, Regarding Peaches and Bananas, Part 2, Section 2, Letting It Steam, Paragraph 4, Clauses 6-8

The bathroom was much less filthy, and this, I thought, could only mean one thing: Luke probably had not been taking advantage of it - but I'm sure that you could think of other, equally plausible theories. Enough about Luke; I refrained from cleaning his bathroom - let's leave it at that. Letting the shower run, I washed out my mouth and sat down on the toilet.

– Title 1, Regarding Peaches and Bananas, Part 2, Section 2, Letting It Steam, Paragraph 2, Clauses 1-3

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Usage of Steam in Tsiga Tsiga Tsiga

Bullets whizzing by a statue of Nikola Tesla

A collection of stories featuring a sexy Parisian ghost, a spooky Moon base full of vagina-faced aliens, a policeman with an Irish name, a truck full of watermelons, a flautist, and a man who has to see another man about a diseased horse.

A wisp of steam rose from the rocks. Tae felt the urge to check it out. "Excuse me," he said. He left Kwon and Do behind. He climbed the rocks with his bare feet. He heard the sounds of splashing. Two women laughed. A man said, "That bean counter wanted us to till fields." It was Kung. "I showed her. We marked out the best spots for ourselves-right next to a hot spring. We should open a resort. Charge the others admission."

– from “How Tae & Bo Took Over the World and Kung & Fu Didn't,” an apocryphal bible story featuring a strange settlement

"What would they pay us with?" asked one of the women.

"Rice. Why should I waste my time rotting my ankles? I could be here, rotting my entire body."

Tae poked his head over the edge of a rock. A few meters below, Kung lay naked, neck-deep in a pool of steaming water. Bei swam next to him. Fu sat on the edge, soaking her feet.

Kung suggested they cool off on the grass. Bei agreed. They climbed out.

"I'll be here," said Fu.

– from “How Tae & Bo Took Over the World and Kung & Fu Didn't,” an apocryphal bible story featuring a settlement composed solely of criminals

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Usage of Steam in Sorry Ms. Jackson

Chiseled letters from an ancient stone tablet hanging on a wall

A real play. With drama in it. Talk fast. It takes two hours. Set in a guest house. In a small community. After a murder. Lots of suspicion. The characters learn to listen to each other. It's funny.

"Steam" does not make an appearance in Sorry Miss Jackson.

- Michal Slaby

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Usage of Steam in Miscellaneous Dingbats

The title of the book at the end of a string of miscellaneous dingbats

A story book full of short fiction stories. An interesting bedtime mystery. A fairy tale. Science fiction romance. Adult life. Uninspiring gay fiction. Horror.

"Steam" does not make an appearance in Miscellaneous Dingbats

- Michal Slaby

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Collocation of Steam in the Fiction Corpus

Table of Collocation for the Word "Steam."

This table lists in descending order of frequency a selection of word pairs that appear in the Fiction Corpus and groups them according to the morphological derivation of the word steam that appears in the pair.

TypeWORDFrequency
TOTAL # of occurencesMCDONALDSJESUSSEXTSIGAJACKSONDINGBATS
modern/sloppybiblical/tersepoetic/high-browhard/fasttalkymixed salad
--------
I have yet to perform a collocation analysis of "steam." I hope I can get it done sometime soon. -Michal

Love is the answer...

What are we waiting for? Let's accept it!

Are you a eunuch?

The art show that defies abuse

Filth, Portraiture

Censorship says everything...as should modern wall art

It's natural to hide dirty things. They're embarrassing. But we need to keep in mind that when we hide things that are difficult, we make them seem dirty when they're really something else entirely. And when we keep things that are easy in plain sight, we make them seem clean when they really aren't. That is dangerous.

A miniature portrait of MichalMargo at the beach

Help maintain the "Steam" page up and running...

If you love women and art...

Michal is importing art...is he certifiable?

Michal's Sales Pitch
Lot 1: Silesian Handicrafts

  1. T-shirt fundraiser for sale

    Handcrafted t-shirt fundraiser for sale.

    Last T-Shirt with the logo that I designed. Pointer

    From a set of, I believe, twenty produced by Margo and given out to a portion of the last 20 women to finish the 20th anniversary Fiat Road Race in Bielsko-Biała, cf. the movie. This is the last one left in it's original packaging and my supporters - like the poor women of Bielsko - are going to have to fight for it. Whoever invests the most money with me, and who lets me borrow it to invest in the next lot, will not only be rewarded with some beautiful piece of art, but will get this priceless t-shirt as a reward for being my top supporter. $1000.00 or best offer. Remember to authorize me to hold the sum as credit against a future purchase and to authorize me to borrow against it.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #1 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  2. Felt handbag for sale

    Handcrafted felt handbag for sale.

    Felt bag by Dorota. Pointer

    Entirely hand-sewn. Base: polyester felt, 100% PE. Motif: South American woolen yarn, dyed, 100% wool. Hand-worked with a needle. Unique and inimitable design. Inside: cotton fabric, closes with zipper, inside pocket. Available now for $220.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #2 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  3. Decorative collar for sale

    Handcrafted decorative collar for sale.

    Decorative collar by Zuzanna. Pointer

    Ethnic layered cloth jewelry constructed on a cotton base and adorned with ribbons, tassels, and a yellow fringe. Fastened on the side with 11 buttons, fitted entirely with a pleasant lining. The style is an Indo-Asian-African multinational color combination. The collar is very extravagant and an extraordinary addition to any clothing, guaranteed to attract attention. Just a simple dress and a unique image is ready. Dry-cleaning recommended. Available now for $200.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #3 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  4. Seamless handbag for sale

    Handcrafted seamless handbag for sale.

    Handbag by Sylwia. Pointer

    Handmade from felted all-natural Australian and South American wool. Entirely felted, seamless. Finished with a white lining, inside is a small pocket. Lining is sewn and stitched in by hand. Available now for $180.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #4 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  5. Patchwork quilt for sale

    Handcrafted patchwork quilt for sale.

    Patchwork quilt by Alicja. Pointer

    Bedspread made of cotton and polyester material. Inserted with polyester lining. 90 by 70 cm. Available now for $120.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #5 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  6. Nuno-felt shawl for sale

    Handcrafted nuno-felt shawl for sale.

    Shawl by Sylwia. Pointer

    Scarf made ​​with the nuno felting technique (wet felting fibre into a silk gauze) using South American wool. Two-sided scarf with latticework at the ends. Wholly in the colors red, black, green in an abstract pattern. Available now for $100.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #6 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  7. Clara the doll for sale

    Handcrafted clara the doll for sale.

    Clara by Alicja. Pointer

    Clara loves roses and greenery, adores tormenting spiders with long legs and sleeping soundly in the afternoon. Cuddly toy made of cotton and polyester, stuffed with polyester lining. Available now for $70.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #7 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  8. Noah the doll for sale

    Handcrafted noah the doll for sale.

    Noah by Alicja. Pointer

    Noah doesn't know what to like and what not to like but keeps wondering and thinking about it. Cuddly toy made of cotton and polyester, stuffed with polyester lining. Available now for $70.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #8 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  9. Black suspenders for sale

    Handcrafted black suspenders for sale.

    Black suspenders by Zuzanna. Pointer

    Two-sided suspenders from black material with a rose motif on one side and striped cotton on the other. Connected by a leather triangle. Adjustable length. Hand washing in cold water recommended. Available now for $50.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #9 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  10. Orange suspenders for sale

    Handcrafted orange suspenders for sale.

    Orange suspenders by Zuzanna. Pointer

    Two-sided suspenders made of denim and orange material with a Polish floral folk design. Connected by a leather triangle. Adjustable length. Hand washing in cold water recommended. Available now for $50.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #10 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  11. Green suspenders for sale

    Handcrafted green suspenders for sale.

    Green suspenders by Zuzanna. Pointer

    Two-sided suspenders made of denim and green material with a mountain folk design. Connected by a leather triangle. Adjustable length. Hand washing in cold water recommended. Available now for $50.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #11 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  12. Felt earrings for sale

    Handcrafted felt earrings for sale.

    Felt earrings by Dorota. Pointer

    Material: South American woolen yarn, dyed, 100% wool. Hand-worked with a needle. Pendant of anti-allergenic metal. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #12 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  13. Round ceramic earrings for sale

    Handcrafted round ceramic earrings for sale.

    Round ceramic earrings by Dorota. Pointer

    Material: Glazed ceramics, hand-molded. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #13 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  14. Oblong ceramic earrings for sale

    Handcrafted oblong ceramic earrings for sale.

    Oblong ceramic earrings by Dorota. Pointer

    Material: Glazed ceramics, hand-molded. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #14 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

  15. 'Coral' necklace for sale

    Handcrafted 'coral' necklace for sale.

    Corals by Sylwia. Pointer

    Necklace made ​​of cotton pieces with organdy and decorated with beads, suspended on cotton strings. Can be worn as a necklace, as a brooch or as a belt tied at the side. Available now for $40.00. Ships free of additional charge via USPS (uninsured) unless otherwise directed.

    To purchase please mail a USPS money order in an envelope clearly marked Lot #1/Item #15 to M. Slaby at house number 201 on Ridge Road in the town of West Milford, in the state of New Jersey, one of the beautiful United States of America. The postal code is 07480-3112.

Handcrafted t-shirt fundraiser
Handcrafted felt handbag
Handcrafted decorative collar
Handcrafted seamless handbag
Handcrafted patchwork quilt
Handcrafted nuno-felt shawl
Handcrafted clara the doll
Handcrafted noah the doll
Handcrafted black suspenders
Handcrafted orange suspenders
Handcrafted green suspenders
Handcrafted felt earrings
Handcrafted round ceramic earrings
Handcrafted oblong ceramic earrings
Handcrafted 'coral' necklace