Michal believes in helping women through film... Is he a fool?

Posted:⚒ 30༚♐²⁶/₂₄♀

To me, the vagina is a symbol of equality and acceptance. In our modern age, we may not all have passed through one, but the door is always open - to everything, for better or for worse. I want to protect that idea. I want others to open themselves up to the needs of others. I want them to listen.

Despite the enormous challenge, I'm learning to listen to women. Everyone should have the same chance to reap the benefits of that knowledge.

I've decided to export fine art handcrafted by women in Poland to America. High quality handcrafted art produced by high quality women deserves to be shared. The more I can sell stateside to people who know the difference, the more I can buy from those whose worthy hands to continue the fight for openness and equality, a fight that I've taken to the world wide web.

Your support ensures that films for women will make a difference.

Previous Clip — 1080p
720p
540p
360p
Without Subtitles
If the clip has trouble playing please try a version with a lower resolution.
Janina: An Oral History of the Twentieth Century in Southern Poland
Chapter 35: Marlboro Cigarettes
Janina recalls her bold attempts to sell cigarettes while in Vienna and the large fruit she found there that reminded her of her home in Trembowla and her naughtiness as a young girl.
Chapter 1: Introduction
Chapter 2: Emigration
Chapter 3: Borderlands
Chapter 4: Evacuation
Chapter 5: Death on the Steppe
Chapter 6: Captive
Chapter 7: A Proper Man
Chapter 8: A Royal Capital City
Chapter 9: Homecoming
Chapter 10: A Shared History
Chapter 11: Market Town
Chapter 12: Enemies of Communism
Chapter 13: The Chimneys
Chapter 14: Terrible Times
Chapter 15: The Bearing
Chapter 16: Shoah
Chapter 17: Blood
Chapter 18: Schnapps
Chapter 19: A Polish Army
Chapter 20: The Meritorious
Chapter 21: Exile
Chapter 22: A Cold Wagon
Chapter 23: Giving Back
Chapter 24: Barefoot
Chapter 25: A Land Reclaimed
Chapter 26: The "English" German
Chapter 27: Ox and Horse
Chapter 28: The Nursery
Chapter 29: Tekla's Bequest
Chapter 30: The People's Poland
Chapter 31: Orangeade
Chapter 32: Trenches
Chapter 33: Kolkhoz
Chapter 34: FSO Siren
Chapter 35: Marlboro Cigarettes
Chapter 36: "Write Letter!"
The whole movie at once.

Next Clip — 1080p
720p
540p
360p
Without Subtitles
If the clip has trouble playing please try a version with a lower resolution.
Janina: An Oral History of the Twentieth Century in Southern Poland
Chapter 35: Marlboro Cigarettes
Janina recalls her bold attempts to sell cigarettes while in Vienna and the large fruit she found there that reminded her of her home in Trembowla and her naughtiness as a young girl.
Chapter 1: Introduction
Chapter 2: Emigration
Chapter 3: Borderlands
Chapter 4: Evacuation
Chapter 5: Death on the Steppe
Chapter 6: Captive
Chapter 7: A Proper Man
Chapter 8: A Royal Capital City
Chapter 9: Homecoming
Chapter 10: A Shared History
Chapter 11: Market Town
Chapter 12: Enemies of Communism
Chapter 13: The Chimneys
Chapter 14: Terrible Times
Chapter 15: The Bearing
Chapter 16: Shoah
Chapter 17: Blood
Chapter 18: Schnapps
Chapter 19: A Polish Army
Chapter 20: The Meritorious
Chapter 21: Exile
Chapter 22: A Cold Wagon
Chapter 23: Giving Back
Chapter 24: Barefoot
Chapter 25: A Land Reclaimed
Chapter 26: The "English" German
Chapter 27: Ox and Horse
Chapter 28: The Nursery
Chapter 29: Tekla's Bequest
Chapter 30: The People's Poland
Chapter 31: Orangeade
Chapter 32: Trenches
Chapter 33: Kolkhoz
Chapter 34: FSO Siren
Chapter 35: Marlboro Cigarettes
Chapter 36: "Write Letter!"
The whole movie at once.

Pronunciation of Funny Short Story

I have yet to publish a pronunciation for the words "funny short story."

Video of me pronouncing "funny short story."

Definition of Funny Short Story

I have yet to publish the definition of Funny Short Story.

I'm sure it won't take too long.

References for funny short story

I have yet to find good references for Funny Short Story

Samples of Fiction from Michal's Corpus

Michal's Fiction Corpus of Acceptance Literature (FiCAL) is presented under the Bare Bottom imprint. It is currently comprised of six bodies of work, each representing a different pillar of culture and incorporating a wide variety of writhing styles.

If you're wondering...

How do I use this?

Just click on a title to see examples of "writing" from a particular work. You'll stay on the same spot on the page, only the Table of Contents will disappear. To get back to the Table of Contents just click next to the image of the Bare Bottom imprint where it says "Back to Samples of Writing: Table of Contents."“And...?”

In the case of common words, a Table of Frequency and a Table of Collocation provide numerical information about how many times a word appears in its original or modified form and with which words. It can help to give you an idea of how common words are used and in what contexts. Find them in the "Common Words of English" part of the Education section.“Ok.”

Why a Fiction Corpus?

The popular understanding of the word "fiction" and its complement "non-fiction" is a reflection of the cultural influence of a classification system. The Dewey Decimal System is responsible for separating "fiction" from all other work and categorizing it by author's name. This has influenced the popular idea of fiction as a narrative that tends to be "untrue" and the product of an individual's fantasy, a bias compounded by modern art's century-long obsession with abstraction, surrealism and self-expression.“So...?”

My idea of fiction rests on the idea that art doesn't have to be factual to be a true reflection of our existence. Adam and Eve didn't have to exist as two individuals 700 generations ago for them to be true portraits of two human beings trying to work together.“And...?”

The Bible is a Fiction Corpus. It is a body of writing that isn't overly concerned with facts and yet its words carry weight. It was written by many different authors living in different places with different audiences in mind, yet everyone gleans something from it.“Right...”

In preparing my fiction corpus, I have striven to see the world through the eyes of others. Through the eyes of my Adams and Eves I hope that you too will glean some truth about our existence. At the very least you will learn some more about how one man can use the English language.“Ok.”

Who are you, Michal?

I'm just a guy who makes art. And if you're interested in making a solid investment in an aesthetic that supports our present and future welfare, then I will help you look for something that you can buy.“How...?”

Everybody makes. Everybody sells. Some people know how to protect their interests. Some better than others. Few people know how to listen. Listening to somebody means considering their interests as if they were your own. Going out and doing something to satisfy another person's interest is how we build a strong economy. Without a strong economy, democracy collapses.“And...?”

Buying 4Occupy is buying for democracy. Don't give your money to somebody who's ruining it. There's no such thing as cheap democracy, quick democracy, or easy democracy. There's good, solid, complete democracy and the tyranny of feudalism. Let's not mix the two. Let's not buy everything on the cheap. Let's not create another tyrant and enslave ourselves because it was easier not to think about what we were doing. Let's protect our interests. Let's listen.“Ok.”

Who's really behind this site?

Have you ever been to one of those post-it-yourself retail websites where there's a really attractive top-seller ready to give you tips on how you can be a top-seller too?“Uh...”

Have you ever been to a "job" interview where you sit in a line, walk through one door, get hired as a contractor and walk out another door, so that the other applicants don't realize that everyone's getting "hired" to work in the same market?“Maybe...”

The internet is full of people who are ready to exploit your ignorance. They are people who want to make money at the expense of our economy. They are cheats.“And...?”

I, Michal, am behind this site. Not some fat plutocrat exploiting my image. I like to do things the right way. I like to work with people who take the time to do things right.“Why...?”

I used to work for a company that didn't do things the right way. My labor was exploited because of mismanagement. That company was the United States Postal Service, an independent agency of the United States Government that is ultimately controlled by Congress. I'm mad because if the Federal Government can exploit labor, who is going to stop every other cheat from doing it?“Labor Unions...?”

Don't say labor unions. I went to my labor union and they did nothing. They ignored me because labor unions aren't democracies. Holding a free and fair election for a "representative" once in a blue moon does not equal people ruling. Democracy means open government. It means we the public need to accept the hard work. It's the only way to secure liberty and equality.“Ok.”

What's the difference between use and usage?

Definition-wise, not much. But the -age suffix is ultimately French in origin and with most things French, at least in American eyes, the immediate thought is that of something precious and arcane whose value should be judged very carefully. This is in contrast to the word France, which is associated with a beautiful place. Thus people in France or from France are beautiful, warm, kind people. Generous even. Unlike French people who suck. Unless you're frenching, in which case you're only sometimes sucking.“And...?”

Along those lines, usage means you're in bed. Use means you're just heavy petting. Also notice that common people, like common words, get used...whereas "proper" things make "appearances." Whether or not you are being exploited is a different story. Exploitation is what happens when somebody uses you or your property without listening to you. Listening is what happens when you consider another person's needs as if they were your own. You don't have to satisfy those needs. All you need to do is consider them. So many of us can't even do that.“So...?”

Help stop exploitation. Buy 4occupy. Buy a better world. Whether or not you feel you can afford to buy art, consider joining my protest. I want to guarantee every working man and every working mother on this planet a 15-day universal holiday. But I can't. Only we can do that. We have to work together. We have to accept the idea that everyone deserves time for himself and we need to build that time into a new kind of calendar. We have to give peace it's own day. We have to make love something you can't avoid. We have to make even the most miserly cold-hearted capitalist among us say that he cashed his check on Love Your Neighbor Day. There won't be any other way to say it once the Acceptance Calendar is widely adopted.“Ok.”

Back to Samples of Story Writing: Table of Contents

Samples of Story Writing from Death to McDonalds

An aerial view of Dodger Stadium in the foreground, with an imaginary partially submerged Los Angeles behind — A story bible for a comic book series set in a post climate-change California narrated by eight characters who live through a natural disaster that sinks Los Angeles and triggers a war with an expansionist Mexican government covertly supported by China.

Frame #649

i scheduled a meeting with bernstein for tomorrow. he wants to meet at the courthouse too. its like the walls of the prisons are crumbling.

Sprint "Iphone" Case

2 August, 5:47 PM

Frame #691

barrys daughter is at the courthouse again. she saw me from across the hall. she waved a finger at me. not the middle one.

Sprint "Iphone" Case

3 August, 12:11 PM

Back to Samples of Story Writing: Table of Contents

Samples of Story Writing from The Gospel of Jesus H.

A picture of the planet Mars — An experimental science fiction Christology that makes Jesus the hard boiled narrator of his own early years on a bizarro earth made dark by volcanic ash and informally ruled by a man from Mars who sells bottled air.

"'He did it alright,' said the miner. 'But first, he had a great feast: three bowls of pickle soup to start! Green salad! Potato salad! Sausage! Two pieces of ham! A pheasant! Partridge! Grouse! You see what I'm talking about? The man had game birds on Mars! The governor's meat! Game! On Mars! Roebuck! Moose! Wild boar! His father built a sheltered wilderness! He hunted! He ate the game! With sauerkraut and beans! With gravy! Bowls of fruit! Pears and peaches! Plums and grapes! A bowl of nuts for dessert! Platefuls of cakes! Jam! And then...'

"'What?' I asked, my eyes wide open.

– Verses 65-66 from the chapter called Childhood

We are always intrigued by the unfamiliar. Someday, perhaps Russians will bring us chicken broth and we will wonder at it. My grandmother used to tell me how Poles went to Germany to sell their lard, and how it sold! as if Germans had never seen a pig before! Lard with onions! On bread! Smeared on bread! Lard smeared on bread was the greatest thing they had ever seen. It makes one laugh, but these things happen.

– Verse 71 from the chapter called Childhood

Back to Samples of Story Writing: Table of Contents

Samples of Story Writing from Sex for Children

A drawing of a man between a woman's legs in front of another man in a hospital bed — A literature book narrated by a pair of siblings on either side of the Atlantic whose profoundly weird sexual experiences pose a serious challenge to their traditional understanding of mathematicians, marriage, gay young men and God.

But he was always telling his stories to other people. Some of them I would hear several times, depending on the company we shared, but never, not once, was I personally privileged with a story. His opinions I would hear, sometimes even his principles; he always shared his feelings, which is something I rarely did and only with great difficulty; on the other hand, he rarely gossiped, but he offered countless anecdotes, often involving other people; none of these, however, were stories, which included all these elements and more besides.

– Title 1, Regarding Peaches and Bananas, Part 2, Section 5, Falling in Love, Paragraph 4, Clauses 4-7

But my jealousy and our intimate relations were able to coexist for a long time, and one did not overpower the other until, of course, a woman came between us. Ms. Christie was a charming woman, in large part because, unlike Macy, she was completely artless - by which I mean: it was much harder for me to notice when and how she was consciously pursuing self-promotion.

– Title 1, Regarding Peaches and Bananas, Part 2, Section 6, Third Party Intervention, Paragraph 1, Clauses 1-3

Back to Samples of Story Writing: Table of Contents

Samples of Story Writing from Tsiga Tsiga Tsiga

Bullets whizzing by a statue of Nikola Tesla — A collection of stories featuring a sexy Parisian ghost, a spooky Moon base full of vagina-faced aliens, a policeman with an Irish name, a truck full of watermelons, a flautist, and a man who has to see another man about a diseased horse.

"Don't be afraid," said Nike. "That's just my ride. My friend was looking for me." The woman held her tongue. "You shouldn't be walking out here: it's dangerous." Silence. "Criminals are known to drive around. They prey on lonely people." Silence. "I'm not one of them. I'm not supposed to be here. I'm passing through. You shouldn't be alone-do you have a phone?"

The woman opened her mouth. She hesitated to speak. She finally said, "I'm not alone."

– from “Paris Is For Rapists, Too,” a ghost story featuring poverty of the mind

"Wait!" cried Nike. "Let me help." He caught up. He darted in front of her. He stopped her by the shoulders. "Who?" he asked. "Who told you to come?" Her eyes filled with-not terror-something like ambivalence. Nike pressed the question. "What's his name?"

She tried to pass. Nikki pushed back.

– from “Paris Is For Rapists, Too,” a ghost story about the human body

Back to Samples of Story Writing: Table of Contents

Samples of Story Writing from Sorry Ms. Jackson

Chiseled letters from an ancient stone tablet hanging on a wall — A real play. With drama in it. Talk fast. It takes two hours. Set in a guest house. In a small community. After a murder. Lots of suspicion. The characters learn to listen to each other. It's funny.

(GREY GOOSE and LUKE exit.)

MS. JACKSON: Barbarians.

ALICE: Some honeymoon: Luke spends more time with your husband than he does with me.

MS. JACKSON: He can have him. I do feel sorry for you, Alice.

ALICE: I don't mind. He makes up for it with other, more important qualities of manliness.

LESBIAN: Is he large?

ALICE: Yes.

MS. JACKSON: How large?

ALICE: Massive. I can barely take it.

LESBIAN: I don't know if I would like that.

– ACT I, lines 385-393

FLETCHER: Bigger than your husband.

LESBIAN: Or so I'm told. I didn't actually see them. What I saw was smaller: about six or seven feet. They had these big beaks and enormous eyes made from concentric circles: each circle colored differently from the next. They looked like crazed chickens dancing around like that. Of course, with masks so big, the focus turns to a dancer's legs, the swaying of his hips-

MS. JACKSON: And everything in between.

ALICE: Ms. Jackson!

LESBIAN: His arms are busy holding up the mask.

MS. JACKSON: I'm not surprised: making women do the work.

LESBIAN: I wonder if any Polynesians use a big mask. Would your cook know?

MS. JACKSON: Probably not. Where is my cook? Does she know the kitchen still needs cleaning?

FLETCHER: Why are you looking at me?

– ACT I, lines 424-432

Back to Samples of Story Writing: Table of Contents

Samples of Story Writing from Miscellaneous Dingbats

The title of the book at the end of a string of miscellaneous dingbats — A story book full of short fiction stories. An interesting bedtime mystery. A fairy tale. Science fiction romance. Adult life. Uninspiring gay fiction. Horror.

Before Putin left I asked him if a plague had wiped out the rest of the village. He went into a rant about how the other villagers were idiots. The women who had been with me on the minibus had accused me of trying to seduce them or to poison them with chocolates. They were convinced I was here to do the same thing to the kids. They told the parents to keep their children at home until the headman could figure out what to do. I was taken aback. I never thought a box of chocolates could turn somebody into a devil. I knew it wasn't the chocolates. It made me wonder though what would have been their excuse if not that.

– from “A Black Man in Moscow,” an inspirational story based on things that were actually reported, though the details are fictional

I don't know who to thank for my fate. I know God has a lot to do with it. As does Putin. And my own imagination. And the many friends of mine at university. And Barack. And Obama. And Khalifa.

– from “A Black Man in Moscow,” an inspirational story that describes what certain people go through, though hopefully you're not one of them